Why we need to rethink the industry of death
About Rachel
Ys social influencer and roving reporter, avid foodie and devotee of the grape.
I went to a funeral recently. Actually, before the funeral, there was a rosary. If you’re Italian and Catholic, you’ll know what that is. It’s a ceremony usually held the evening before the funeral where a priest says the rosary and the guests join in, all the while surrounding the deceased.
Firstly, the cost. While the family insisted that my beloved grandmother deserved the very best that the funeral home had to offer, even a modest funeral will set you back tens of thousands of dollars.
And that’s just the funeral. Then there’s the burial. Depending on your choice of method, you’re looking at a similarly hefty amount.
Secondly, the wider concept of ‘the funeral’ and its processes. At every turn, a friendly but slightly pushy funeral home director encouraged my family members to put on a show for the crowd.
At the rosary, they asked my distraught grandfather if he would like a closed or open casket, even though the family had previously requested closed. In his emotional state, he overrode the decision and asked for it to stay open... which made him more upset.
At the close of the ceremony, they asked him to stand up alone in front of the silent, staring crowd and approach the open casket. Of course, he did, and all I could think as we watched him break down in front of us was about the unnecessary spectacle of it all. Why are we making death a perfectly designed event?
When the proceedings had been and gone, and all we were left with some leftover cake and the bill, I concluded that this tradition so ingrained in our modern-day society was created all for the benefit of one entity: the funeral homes.
The big song and dance, the slow processions, the stretch limos and catering at the wake are all presented to a fragile family as just what you need to do. You can go for the cheaper options, but really ... weren’t they worth it?
All of this poses a bigger question about the importance of funerals and the traditional methods of burial.
Who exactly do they purpose and who should they purpose? These days, more people are opting for less traditional methods of burial, placing a much-needed emphasis on the environment.
Conservation cemeteries, or natural burial processes, are slowly gaining popularity. The method explores the idea that death and decay is, and always will be, the natural end to life.
Rather than embalming a body using highly toxic chemicals that are harmful to the environment - as well as wasting resources encasing the body in metal, concrete and hardwood - natural burials embrace the environments organic response to death.
In just 4-6 weeks of being placed among soil, a decaying body will actually turn into soil. Families can plant trees or shrubs in that soil and from then on, the land and your loved one are preserved.
In fact, I'd highly recommend watching this thoughtful TED talk by mortician and funeral director Caitlin Doughty, as she explores new ways to prepare us for inevitable mortality. Caitlin lifts the lid on the funeral industry and explores the ideas of "recomposting" and "conservation burial" that return our bodies back to the earth in an eco-friendly, humble and self-aware way.
As a society, we should start seeing death as an opportunity to celebrate that life with a positive action, not just follow expensive and environmentally harmful procedure.
Death can be transformed into positivity and health for the environment.
And why wouldn’t we all want to gain something in the face of loss?
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