We are told so many lies when we are young.

Some, like those relating to Father Christmas, are told to make us feel better about life. Others, such as adults know best, are told to us to make life easier for our parents. Then there are those relating to life after death, which are told to comfort us. And then there is "God is watching you", which is designed to control our behaviour.

The lies I want to talk about today are part of a socialisation process designed to encourage conformity.

Read more: The lies we were told as children #2

Much of our early life is about socialisation. Many of the behavioural traits we are taught are designed to socialise us. School is much more about socialisation than education. Conformity is highly valued in most societies, including our own. Some lies are designed to aid the socialisation process.

When I was young, I was told by my parents (who later changed their minds entirely), my grandparents (who went to their graves believing it) and my teachers (some of who were fanatics) that the Queen and the Royal family were to be respected. I was told that even if I did not like the individual who held the office of King or Queen, it was important to respect the office that they held. I was told that the monarchy was to be respected, both as our head of state and head of church.

Now well into my adulthood, I can see nothing about the royal family that I should respect. My research into this cohort has led me to the view that neither the individuals, nor the office they hold, deserve any form of respect - and now view it as a responsibility to contribute to ending the relationship between them and this country.

When I was young, I was told that it was right to respect my elders. The suggestion was, that respect was somehow linked to age and that an individual should be respected by virtue of their age alone.

Now, in my adulthood, I find this notion absurd. Age is not a factor that should be considered in determining whether I respect someone or not. Behaviour should be the only criteria for determining the level of respect anyone, including me, gets.

When I was young, I was told that marriage and children were in my future, that sex before marriage was wrong (or at best undesirable) and that earning an ‘honest living’ was my responsibility.

I have since learned that marriage has no useful purpose, that children are an option (though in my case, a desirable option), that sex before marriage is necessary (as I will never marry) and that it is up to me and me alone to find my passions and decide how I will spend my life. I came to learn that the industrial revolution is over.

One of the biggest lies I was told is that the best way to fix a broken system is from within. I was told that if I did not like the state of the country, I should join a political party, that if I did not like how my community was operating, i should join the local council, that if I was unhappy with the school, I should join the P&C, that if I did not like the way my industry was operating, I should join the professional body.  I found these to be the biggest lies of all.

The idea of changing a system, or situation, from within is firmly rooted in the hope or proposition that if you work to change the system from within, the system will also change you, moderating the level and rate of change. The notion of changing the system from within is a long established method of limiting change.

As an adult, I now recognise that great change requires revolution, and revolutions never start from within. Great change is more often than not inspired by authors, journalists, artists and activists operating outside the system.

Martin Luther King did not work within the system. Nelson Mandela did his best work outside of the system. Socrates never worked within the system, any more than Plato. Copernicus operated outside of the system - and paid with his life. Noam Chomsky will never be part of the system. Voltaire and Robespierre fought against the system. Steve Jobs and Elon Musk rejected the staus quo and created their own. Fred Hollows always operated outside of the system, creating his own. On all levels, many of the greatest change agents were operating outside the system.

The system inspires conformity. Free-thinkers operating outside of it and rejecting the system have the greatest capacity for change.

What lies were you told when you were young??